Neck Strap Chain

Description

There are as many pluses to being in prison as there are cons. For instance, did you know you get three free meals in prison every day? Sure, they’re dreadful (except during lasagna day), but the price is right. There’s a TV in the common room where you can watch anything you want, so long as it’s the same thing as the biggest guy there wants to see too. And if you ever need some alone time, just sign up for solitary confinement. You’ll have months and months all to yourself to do whatever you like, whether it’s working on your interpretive dance routine, making friends with mice, or just going slowly and quietly insane. Sign us up!

If you’d like to live the prisoner lifestyle but are too hung up on concepts like “freedom” and “not ruining your life,” you’re quite in luck! All you need is our Neck Strap Chain and a few other accessories and you’ll look like you’re a horrible reprobate who is fit to be locked away for good. Just think of all the fun you’ll have explaining to the police that you’re not really a fugitive.