Laser Cat-zillas Ugly Christmas Sweater

Description

How many times has it happened where you see an adorable cat, stretched out and basking in the sun, it’s fuzzy little nubsy tum-tum calling out to you like fire to a moth. ‘So soft!’ you think and you know that you’re not only right but also about to be walking into a trap more severe than anything that fish-man admiral could have ever warned us about. That fuzzy kitten is made of equal parts cuddles and claws and, like a Jack-in-the-Box of doom, one never knows how many squishes and scratches we can dare before the terror is unleashed…

But, to what lengths will these dangerous beasts go? We can see the apocalypse now: feline domination everywhere… beams of fiery lasers coming from their eyes. Nothing is sacred to them… for their tum-tums were touched for two seconds too long! Oh, the felinity of it all! They will destroy everything you hold dear, especially the Christmas gifts under the tree that mankind has too long told kitties were supposed to leave alone. Disaster awaits and you can warn humanity of this terrible fate with this Laser Cat-zillas Ugly Christmas sweater. Speak of our future. You are our prophet and only salvation. If nothing else, it is warm and fuzzy… so maybe you will be able to resist the terrible tum-tums.