Wear “wicked” like a badge of honor on the sleeve of your black dress.
Embrace wicked. Hop out of bed in the morning, breathe oxygen, and exhale wickedness. Like the alchemists and sorceresses of those disgusting fairy tales, the quality of being wicked fills our dreams at night, gives impetus to our studies, and provides purpose to our eternal lives. We’re as likely to toss a shiny red apple aside in favor of a rotten green one as we are likely to transform some sassy princess into the most hideous of beasts. We’re wicked because it’s the only way to live.
The so-called saints who see wicked as a derogatory term, to be honest, have very likely been on the wrong end of our wicked spells and curses. …What, don’t look at us like that! They must’ve meddled in our business, or messed up our lawn, or laid their eyes on the wrong prince! Rule #1 of wickedness is, after all, not to let meddling go uncursed, unhexed, or unjinxed!
Rule #2: all black everything all the time. So if you are feeling a little wicked, or you know you’ve got the quality somewhere deep down and would like to tap into it, try slipping into this Plus Size Wicked Queen Costume. Your long-pointed draped sleeves and lacy jeweled necklace will strike fear in the hearts of the pure, and the black and purple will inspire devotion from those down with the wickedness. Remember what we said about wickedness when you’re out on the town. Be it an accidental side-eye, an overt insult, or a usurper to your throne, no meddling may go unpunished!