Seashell Mermaid Costume

Description

It seems like there used to be way more mermaid sightings than we have nowadays. And the conspiracy theorists will try to tell you that the CIA was probably involved, but we’re afraid that all of us might bear a little of the blame. Because how are people supposed to see mermaids when they don’t know the first thing about tracking down mythical creatures? And when was the last time any of us spent any time at all searching for the elusive denizens of the barrier reef that separates real life from the imagination?

So it’s understandable that some people can’t tell an authentic Seashell Mermaid costume like this from False Barnacle Mer-person Garb, which isn’t nearly as bright or beautiful as the real thing. The trick lies in counting the number of scutes between the dorsal eminence and the caudal peduncle, but all those shimmering scales make identification difficult, even for trained professionals. And all the cryptozoologists we know are way too busy tracking down Bigfoot to help us make heads or tails of the stuff we find lying on the beach!

Okay, we don’t actually know that much about merfolk. However, we did realize that we should spend more of our spare time looking for mythical creatures, and we do think that this brilliant costume deserves more attention than the average fish story. But let’s be honest: looking this good, nobody’s going to believe that you simply washed up on the beach!